A True Believer Among Us ....

It never ceases to amaze me, in this Age of Apathy, how some folks have managed to retain their passion for politics. Me, I think of election cycles as a game, a farce cast full of clowns on both sides. I know that sounds cynical, but I've spent too much time around politicians and I've heard too much bullshit rhetoric and pandering to be swept away by anyone's sound bites. The folks who have stayed full of fire, the ones who still get excited by the speeches and the possibility of hope ... I really admire them.

Like my pal Juliana.

Just this morning, we were sitting around her table in Portland when talk turned to the presidential election. She's an avid Dem (me, I'm avidly contemptuous of both parties) and she couldn't be more appalled by John McCain's choice of Sarah Palin as VP. I think her quote went something like, "To have that woman a heartbeart away from the presidency, I can't even imagine it. And McCain, he's 72 years old."

That's when I made my near-fatal mistake. I compared Obama to Palin.

Me: "What qualifies him to be president? What's on his resume?"

Juliana: "Grrrrr. Grumble. Grrrrr."

Me: "Seriously. The guy was a community organizer, then in the Illinois State Senate, then a U.S. Senator. Now he's ready to run the country."

Juliana (with blood in her eyes): "At least he's inspirational."

Me: "So now we're electing a president based on ability to inspire? How is that a qualification?"

You can imagine how badly the talk went after that -- especially when I admitted that I'd likely vote for McCain based on how well I've come to know him over the years (and the fact that he called me an "asshole" a few years ago, which is kind of cool). The moral to the story? That America was a simpler place back when we didn't talk politics in polite company. And that, for every guy like me, who thinks of the political process as a lame joke, there are still some true believers out there.

By the way, here's the coda to the tale. Juliana had a quote that deserves being memorialized for the next few years, at least:

"Mark my words, if McCain is elected president, we'll go to war with Iran within two years. Right after that, they'll appoint as many conservatives as they can to the United States Supreme Court, so I as a woman will no longer have any reproductive rights."

-- Juliana Lukasik
September 9, 2008

There you have it, folks. A vote for McCain could be a vote against uteruses everywhere.